12 Jun 2013

Lana Kali's birth

If you have had special experiences with Sri Swami Vishwananda, we very much welcome you sharing them by sending us an email - especially in light of His birthday tomorrow. Kindly please send your contribution to media@bhaktimarga.org. Many thanks!

Lana Kali's birth on 12/04/2013 by Alice Beins / Kusumitra, Guatemala
The birth of my fifth child Lana Kali was under a special star and under the protection of my guru Sri Swami Vishwananda.
I noticed the pregnancy only at the end of the 5th month of pregnancy. Although I had "suspicions", I ignored these, because I was very sick, especially in early pregnancy. I had parasites and consequently iron anemia. So I noticed my pregnancy only when the stomach started to grow and I felt the first movements of Lana. Although I was worried because I had been so sick, I was delighted and immediately saw her pregnancy as a gift from God.

I immediately had the feeling that she was protected by Sri Swami Vishwananda and Maha Kali.

The pregnancy was not easy because I felt sick the whole pregnancy. The parasites and iron deficiency seemed to follow me and I got gallbladder problems. Finally, I found out that I have a gluten intolerance and that was why I was carrying all these health problems with me. Lana Kali seemed to bring all this to the light.

I tried to enjoy my pregnancy, which was not always very easy, because we had huge financial problems and did not know how to proceed. But everything got better when Robert started to work as a partner in a cafe and I began to cook and bake alongside my work as a mother and housewife for the café as well. It was at times very difficult, as I often felt weak and sick.

The little Lana Kali however always seemed to be strong and healthy, she was moving a lot in my belly and I enjoyed it to feel her growing inside of me.

The pregnancy seemed to fly by and about 2 months before the birth, I suddenly had some feelings of panic. I was not prepared for the birth! I always had so much to do that simply was no time left. I started to read all of my birth books  whenever I had a spare minute, trying as much as possible to meditate. Many feelings came to the surface in the pregnancy and I tackled with these feelings.

A month before the birth many fears came up. I suddenly put myself under pressure. Since I had already experienced incredibly easy births and I always made me strong for a spiritual and unassisted childbirth, I asked myself now, to surpass my last birth ... But at this point came the the fear. What if this time everything would go wrong, if the baby would be sick, or something would happen? Daily new fears arose. My brother helped me a lot, especially in the last 2 weeks of the pregnancy, when the fears were even stronger, we meditated every 2nd day. He helped me and supported me to let go and  helped me to realize more and more the cause of this fear  and to trust in my guru Sri Swami Vishwananda.

Two weeks before the birth my brother went to a Darshan of Swami. Andi was taking a picture of me and my family with him and asked Swamiji to bless me and the baby for the birth. Swami told Andi:. "Please tell your sister that I think about her every day," When I heard this news, I cried. I had felt so lonely the last few weeks, but now I felt much stronger.
Even after this message many feelings came up, but I also knew it had to be like that. Only when our feelings come up and we look at them, we can finally let them go.
On the day of birth, I had slight contractions in the morning. I had previously thought that our child might come that day. It was the energy E 12, according to the spiritual Mayan calendar. The day of fortune and fate. The fear came on this day with full force. Suddenly, I thought again of all the things that could go wrong when you're scared .... So even more fear came. I tried, but I couldn´t let go of that fear. I wrote an email to Swamiji and asked him for his help. Then I wrote to my brother. He told me I should give everything to Swami and accept it as it is.

Finally, Robert came home in the afternoon and calmed me down. I went to the toilet and got calmer and calmer. I decided that I would have to accept now. My daughter wanted to come and I had to let go now. I had my first labor contraction immediately after this decision. I went to Robert and there came an even stronger contraction. I asked him to carry the old pillows up in the meditation room. He helped me and I told him I would call him, if I need him.
I prepared the pillows on the floor and put clean towels over it.
I sat on a plastic tub and there was another contraction. Immediately afterwards followed a very strong contraction in which I felt that the head of Lana coming down. Immediately my waters broke and emptied into the tub. The next contraction came and I felt a slight need to push. With the next contraction I abandoned myself to the pushing urge. During each contraction I chanted "Om" and looked at the picture of Sri Swami Vishwananda.
I rose from the tub and set it aside. I sat in front of my altar and had my left hand on the altar, the other hand I put on my vagina. The next contraction followed, I continued chanting "Om". I vibrated internally and externally, and also my voice vibrated with the "Om". I was sure that this was the Shakti energy that flowed through me.
The next contraction came and I could feel her head on my hand. During the next contraction she slipped out. I saw her face and called Robert. Another contraction followed and she was there! She lay on the pillow and I took her. She began to cry. Robert came in and helped me to place her on my belly. The crying stopped immediately and I stroked her head. As soon as I brought my nipple to her mouth, she began to drink and looked at us attentively. The children came up and were pleased with their new sister. After 30 minutes, Robert cut the umbilical cord and dressed the little girl.
I am very grateful for the very spiritual birth experience. I know we were blessed by Kali and Swami. I was only 15 minutes in my meditation room. The entire birth took less than 30 minutes! I know I was protected, as well as my baby.
After 3 hours I went to the toilet and right away my placenta slipped out. In the evening we held a Mayan fire ceremony and gave the placenta back to the four elements and asked for protection and blessing for our daughter's life. Today, 2 days after birth, the day I'x - the day of Mother Earth - we handed over the ashes to the Lago de Atitlan - the heart of Mother Earth.
Lana means "light" and Maha Kali is the dark Divine Mother.

"Only if you really and sincerely surrender and you surrender to your way, you surrender to what you really want, then you will reach your goal."

Sri Swami Vishwananda


This applies to all aspects of our lives - even for the birth. When I surrendered myself to the birth, everything went so fast. I let my body lead. Our bodies know what to do - instinctively.

Today, the 23rd of April I am writing this and I am still so thankful for this experience. Last weekend my brother went to Swamiji´s Darshan in Springen and again he had a message for me. He said, that my brother should tell me that he loves me and that he is reading all my letters. I was so happy and thankful for this message. I know, even if it is not possible to see Swamiji personally (I never did), he is with me all the time.